Being the Outsider

Let me preface this post by saying that Trieste is a beautiful town filled with wonderful people, places, and culture. I am ecstatic to be here and have this amazing opportunity.

Prior to my arrival I assumed that all the positive attributes of Italy and its people would supersede any difficulties I may encounter. I completely underestimated the differences I would encounter. Everything is slower in Europe, and when I say slower I mean it takes at least twice as long as in America. I have a washing machine, but no dryer, a gas stove you have to light, and the oven in my apartment doesn’t work so we use the one upstairs. I did cook for the first time today; gnocchi with pomodoro and zucchini so all hope is not lost. Buses arrive when the please, professors email you back several days later, and shop owners close whenever the like.

 Grocery shopping should be an Olympic sport. The nice, big supermarket near my apartment is about 1/3 mile away and the walk back is totally uphill. It’s no wonder locals go shopping every few days--you can only carry so much; on my first trip I forgot that I didn’t have a car right outside and wound up walking home with at least 50 extra pounds.

Today was the first day of class. My classes are in English, however, the class is made up totally of native Italian speakers. As I sat in the classroom waiting for the class, surrounded by conversations in a language I do not understand, I came to the realization that this is the first time in my life I have been the outsider, a very lonely feeling. At this moment I knew that I was no longer a tourist; I am now a “stranieri” (stranger), what Italians call foreigners. I am in a new place where everything is done differently, the people are more reserved, and every sentence I attempt includes “grazie (thank you)” and “mi dispiace (I’m sorry).”

Despite the transition not being all rainbows and butterflies with hunky Italian men falling at my feet, I know there is much more in store for me. It is my turn to be challenged and for life to throw me into difficult situations in which I will struggle to accomplish the simplest of tasks, i.e. buying stamps, but grow through the process. Through every small storm I will search for the wind to fill my sails and carry me on into a brighter, bigger horizon.

“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.”              -M. Scott Peck